Red eyed panda
No this isn't a new endangered species. This is my latest and if I say so myself most bizarre and creative of chemo symptoms.
Last week chemo decided to be kind to me. The usual nastiness seemed to be kept at bay. I worked a full day, every day - which for post-chemo week is something of a novelty. My nose didn't bleed. The cramps weren't too bad and even though I had to stop and be sick in a dog poo bag on the way to work, I wasn't actually that ill. No split skin, no bleeding heels. Even the spots seemed less awful.
Ah but chemo is a cunning one. It waits round the corner, giving a sly smile if you relax, then whacks you round the head with a surprise blow designed to fell you at the knees or anywhere else you haven't protected. My arrogance in assuming I had escaped chemo pain has been resoundingly slapped down and sneered at.
This complacency has been rewarded with a whole new look. Tight, sore, red skin under my eyes means that I not only have steroid bloat but puffy swollen eyes too. It's a long way from glamorous and to be honest I can't see it taking off this season. Oh and I have the chin of a 14 year old who spends every free moment in KFC.
Fortunately I have an incredibly supportive boss who said I can work at home today. It's lucky he's agreed this as whilst I love Battersea my unattractive new look means that I have might have found myself getting rehomed as a St Bernard albeit one with spots.